The Magic TV Set
by The Maiden of Light
Summary: Naruto buys a new Surround Experience TV and it brings on a bit more of an adventure than the nine rookies, the Gai team, and the Sand Siblings like.
1. Brand New TV Set

Disclaimer: If you think the Naruto series belongs to me and not all these other people writing about it, then we've got a problem. And if we've got a problem, you've got a problem. I love that line!

The Magic TV

Chapter 1

Better than a Movie

The evening begins when our favorite ninja cast waiting around in Naruto's apartment for him to get back with the new television set before the movie starts. Sasuke, Shikamaru, and Shino sat on the three cushion couch; Ino, Sakura, and Hinata squeezed together on the two cushion couch; Kankuro sat in the rocker; while Neji, TenTen, Kiba, Choji and Rock Lee sat on the floor. Gaara used his chakra to seat himself on the ceiling.

The door to the apartment flew open and everyone looked around to see Naruto walking in dragging a huge cardboard box.

He smiled loudly, "Hey everyone, I'm back! And look what I got!"

Shikamaru rolled over on his back on the floor, "It's about time you got here. What is that thing, a theater screen?"

"Nope," Naruto grinned.

He pushed it over to where the old television set used to be and tore away the cardboard. Everyone's jaw immediately dropped towards the floor, with the exception of the upside-down Gaara whose jaw rose towards the ceiling and Naruto who was smiling triumphantly. There sat a fancy, new, gleaming television set.

Tears were forming in Choji's eyes, "It's so beautiful."

Naruto leaned against it with a gloat full air about him over his new favorite toy in the house, "This baby is awesome. I'll have to go a while without food, but it was definitely worth it! And the best part…"

He retrieved the remote control from his pocket and pressed the power button, turning the set on. Suddenly the room around them became a tall grassy plain of African safari land.

"What the heck happened!" Ino shouted and jumped into Sasuke's arms. No one heard Sakura grumble.

And unfamiliar voice omnisciently spoke without a source.

_The Serengeti of Africa experiences two seasons: the wet season and the dry season. It the wet season, the animals prosper in the vast vegetation for half a year, and then struggle to survive in the dry season. _

"I get it," Shikamaru spoke up, "The TV puts us right in the middle of the program. The voice we heard was the narrator of the Discovery Channel."

Naruto spoke, "That's right Lazy bum. This is a magical television set. It puts you right in all the action of your favorite programs."

He took in a deep breath and exhaled, "Ah. You can even smell the nature."

Gaara, whom was now sitting upsides-down on a tree branch, made his presence known, "As…enriching as this is and all, weren't we here for a purpose other than exploring a continent we have no relevance to?"

Naruto looked as though a light went off in his head, "Oh yeah, the movie! Which channel is it on?"

"Forty-four," Kiba mumbled.

Shino looked at the watch around his wrist, "We have ten minutes until the movie begins."

Sakura jumped forward, "Hey, since we still have ten minutes and a whole scale of channels at our discretion, let's go on an adventure."

Neji spoke as he tightened his headband, "Sounds good to me."

"I believe we forgot something," everyone in the area looked towards the speaker, Sasuke.

"What is it, Uchiha jerk?" Naruto asked.

Sasuke, whom had gotten used to the nickname, responded, "The new channel arrangements. The stations decided to reorder and group channels accorded to type like sports, kid shows and cooking channels together. They started this morning, so we have no idea what channel the movie is really on."

Everyone, except the cool-as-a-cucumber few, gasped. It was true. They had remembered being told about the change, but no one remembered to apply it.

* * *

Back in Naruto's living room, a certain silver-haired Jounin had slipped into through the open door.

"Hello," Kakashi called into the house, "I believe I was invited to the movie."

He looked around. The living room was barren of his ex-students and their friends. There were a few pairs of sandals neatly placed beside the doorway and a candy wrapper or two on the floor. The kitchen that conjoined to it was vacant as well, with the exception of a medium-sized white dog curled up sound asleep in the corner beside a cleaned plate of some leftover. It was Kiba's dog, Akamaru. This was odd to the Copy-nin because Kiba never left his beloved pet alone if he could help it. No sounds were coming from the apartment other than the hum of the brand new TV left on in the living room.

"Well," Kakashi said to himself as he squat down in from of the new set, "This is a rather nice television set. It looks brand new."

His single eye gazed around on the floor for a moment, being caught by the glint of light reflecting from the black plastic remote. He reached for it and made a few observations as he scanned it over.

A glowing red light caught his eye, "What the..? What is Surround Experience? If that is what I think it is, the kids might hurt their ears with all that loud noise."

He pressed the button.

* * *

Sakura puffed a heavy breath and leaned against the tree Gaara was suspended from. It was a tall intricate tree with green leaves far to high for an animal besides a giraffe to reach.

"Am I the only one to notice that we've been sitting in a wildlife habitat and haven't made contact with any animals," Ino stated as she plopped down on a rock beside Temari.

Suddenly, the ground beneath them began to quake. Rock Lee looked up and pointed in the direction of a charging stampede rhino, "I think you spoke too soon!"

Everyone darted in a separate direction to flee from the rampaging beasts. Gaara had reached down and grabbed Sakura, hoisting her off the ground when he saw that her foot was tangled in a root overreaching the soil surface.

She watched as a river of huge, gray, stampeding animals trampled beneath her. Dust and dirt were clouding up around their feet. Sakura looked up towards her momentary hero.

"Thanks, Gaara." She smiled at him.

His face was turning red. After all, he had been upside down for the last fifteen minutes.

The last thing anyone heard was Naruto calling out after the rhinos had passed, "Is everyone all right?"

Then, everything went dark.

* * *

Kakashi gazed with a bored look at the screen, watching a traveling herd of rhinos roam across a grassy African plain, "I should watch this when I need something to put me to sleep."

He looked at the remote once more, "I guess Surround Experience has nothing to do with the sound. I guess it's one of those buttons they put on the remote to make you feel more special about your TV."

He pressed the button once more to turn it back on and moved back to sit down on the couch.

"I bet they all just went to get food really quick or something like that."

* * *

"Hey?" Naruto called out, "Where is everybody?"

To be Continued!

The Maiden of Light: What do you think? This is my first Naruto fic if you don't count the first five chapters of When the Cast of Naruto aren't on Camera. That's my brother's. Anyways, I know it doesn't have much to do with the series, but I thought this would be fun. This is just the intro. I will make this a funny adventure yet! Please review! Next chapter: Separated in TV land.


	2. Separated

Chapter 2

Separated

"Hey!" Naruto called out, "Where is everybody?"

He looked around. Wherever he was, he was in a small room with five other people, who all looked similar to him. Naruto these others were standing in a perfectly straight line alone a wall with height lines streaking it. Across from him was a large window, or rather, a mirror.

All the other blonde boys in the room looked at him with curious looks as to why he called out.

"Shut up, stupid," Naruto grumbled and looked away. Then it hit him.

_Oh no…I'm in a police line up! _

He looked onto his chest to see a white sheet of paper with the number four printed onto it pinned to his shirt.

"Hey, wait a second!" He panicked, "I don't belong here! I need to get out of here and find Hinata and the rest!"

Suddenly, the door burst open and a man in a white shirt and gray pants with suspenders approached Naruto with an infuriated red face.

"How do you know Miss Hyuuga?"

Naruto, instead, of answering, cowered in the presence of this rather scary man.

_This is bad. This is really baaadddddd!_

_

* * *

_

"Shikamaru," Ino questioned in a scared voice, "Where are we?"

He looked around. There were panels before them and there were lots of blue things. His ears picked up on a rather catchy song playing, "For once, I'm not sure."

"This is creepy, guys," Kankuro shuffled a bit.

Suddenly, all the lights in the room flared and the sound of applause thundered from a setting of a few hundred people. A man with gray hair and glasses was holding a microphone. The biggest feature of the room was a big board with blue screens showing numbers.

"Good evening, and welcome to _Jeopardy_!"

* * *

Gaara was stunned to find himself where he was. He was no longer hanging from the tree in the African Serengeti or in the minute void of darkness. Now he found himself surrounded by people jumping and screaming of excitement. To be honest, the lack of space and the excess of noise were extremely irritating. Somewhere before him was a glowing stage. A man in a tweed blazer walked out with a microphone. The crowd erupted with applause once more.

He began to speak, "Alright everyone, here's our last lady of the night. She stands out for a mile and so does her singing. Everyone welcome, Miss…Sakura…Haruno!"

"WHAT!" Gaara's eyes shot wide open. He didn't have the slightest idea where he was and what was going on, but it did seem a little odd that Sakura was here as well.

A brilliant glowing neon sign caught his attention.

_American Idol?_

_

* * *

_

"Hey," Temari called out, "Where the heck are we?"

She had noticed that her brothers were absent as well as eleven of her Kohona friends. The only others here were Sasuke and Shino. Both were rather quiet about the situation. A cold wind was rolling over a grassy field. The green leafs of the forest a little ways off were fluttering.

"Things seem peaceful enough," Shino spoke. That was all he said.

Sasuke was actually busy staring into something resting in his palm. It was round and colored red on the top and white on the bottom with a black band around the circumference.

"YOU!" a loud voice called out.

A boy with a blue vest and backwards cap was pointing at them. He yelled out once more, "I CHALLENGE YOU TO A POKEMON BATTLE."

All three Shino, Sasuke, and Temari had very confused looks one their faces.

* * *

A smiley, bright eyes lady with blonde hair cheerfully addressed her audience, "Hello, and welcome back to Cooking with Cathy. Today we have two special guests, Kiba and Choji, who will be helping me make a meal consisting of Spiced Seafood soup, Italian wine bread, and secret recipe white chocolate cheesecake.

Kiba's and Choji's stomachs certainly did not mind the current situation.

* * *

The world around him was too unfamiliar for Neji's liking. In fact, he was in a realm of 2D. The surroundings contained flat color green hills, a blue sky with clouds that all looked the same, and now, a little girl with a monkey beside her were approaching him. The little girl had dark skin and her deep brown hair was almost black. Even her bright round eyes resembled chocolate. Her shirt was pink and her shorts clashed as orange. The primate beside her was an unpleasant purple and he wore little bright red boots on his feet.

"Hola, my name is Dora; and this is my friend, Boots! What is your name?"

Neji grabbed his head in frustration, "Oh my God! You can't be serious!"

* * *

Flashes were popping up everywhere around them. The load roar of the three-sixty degree audience surrounding them was almost painful to the ears. TenTen and Lee looked about. They were apparently the center of attention. The two were staged on an off-white square in the center of a spectator-packed stadium. Their platform was surrounded by ropes that strung from corner post to corner post.

"Are you ready to rummmmbbbbbbllllleeeeeee?"

A bell dinged from somewhere and TenTen and Lee found themselves accompanied in the square by two rather nasty looking men that had to have been made entirely of muscle.

The taller one in red screamed, "I'm gonna take you little kids out!"

Then, they charged.

"Lee," TenTen braced for battle, "I hope you're ready for a match."

* * *

The Maiden of Light: I hope our heros don't get killed somehow! And Kiba and Choji better give me some of that cheesecake! Read and review! 


	3. Law, Order, and Outrunning the Police

Chapter Three

Law, Order, and the Outrunning the Police System

Naruto was cowering before the interrogator. He was a big scary man that was either very crossed or a darn good actor of looking crossed.

_This is bad! This is really baaadddd! _

"Tell me!" He hollered, "How do you know Miss Hinata Hyuuga!"

"Uh…" Naruto racked his brains for a tale, "She's…uh…she's my, um, my translator!"

The man gave Naruto a very funny look, "What nonsense are you talking, boy?"

The interrogator stared Naruto down. The other blonde boys in the line up were watching intently. Naruto spoke, "Yeah! That's it, she's my translator! I was going down to Mexico for a business trip and I requested Miss Hyuuga to translate for me because my Spanish is rusty."

He scratched the back of his head nervously.

_What was I thinking? Only an idiot would fall for that! _

A loud beep came through the speaker fixed on the ceiling. It was followed by a harsh woman's voice:

"-Beep- Miss Hyuuga claims his statement as true."

"Hm," The man scratched his chin.

_I hope this plan works._

Naruto suddenly lunged and threw himself at the one-way mirror. Glass shattered all around him as he darted from one room to the opposing one. He felt tiny stings on his face and arms as bits of mirror were scratching across his skin. A few screams rang out as he burst into the viewing room. Naruto hit the floor. He made sure to cover his face from the raining glass. He looked up. Three people came into vision. Two of them were police officers. The other was a female with short raven hair and pearl white eyes.

"Hinata!" Naruto cried out.

She gasped, "Naruto."

Naruto quickly regained himself to his feet, "Let's get out of here!"

He grabbed Hinata by the wrist and dashed towards the door.

"Stop them!" a police officer shouted.

Stopping to turn the doorknob would take too much time. So instead, Naruto raised his foot into the air and kicked down the door. A loud smashing noise accompanied the loud action. The two ninjas raced through the precinct office with the two cops hot on their tails.

"Somebody stop them!" The interrogator barked out.

Naruto looked around. He and Hinata were blasting past people carrying tall stacks of files and or records binders. A large window that led out into the streets outside was straight ahead. He just needed something to break the glass before they got there. He felt at his thigh were his kunai holster would normally rest. He only found air. The police must have confiscated them. Then, Hinata shouted a small battle cry beside him. A large shuriken flew out of her hand and sawed through the air until it collided with the glass thirty feet in front of them. Glass showered out in every direction. People shrieked and ducked below their desks or cleared out of the way.

"Ready?" Naruto whispered to the girl beside him, "JUMP!"

The ninjas leapt into the air and rolled out into the street. People left and right were evading them as soon as they launched out the broken window. A few ladies screamed at the sight of two kids that weren't even old enough to drive jump out from the precinct building and high tail it out into the street.

"That boy is kidnapping Hyuuga! Take him down!" A man's voice shouted out somewhere behind them.

Suddenly, a wave of bullets fired towards Hinata and Naruto.

The boy had to jump a few times to avoid being struck in the feet. Hinata gasped with worry, "Naruto! Be careful!"

They ran faster, using their chaka to boost their velocity.

Their feet struck the pavement quickly as they ran past people and cars alike. Naruto looked up for another route. The street lamps branching over the roadway caught his attention.

"Hinata. Jump up to the lamp posts and think of trees." Naruto called to his companion.

She nodded in comprehension and the two ninjas separated and leapt into the air. They landed gracefully on the street lights and dove from one to the next. More shots rang past Naruto's ears.

_Darn it! We can't keep running forever! _

* * *

Back in Naruto's apartment, Kakashi sat sluggishly on the couch, casually flipping through the channels.

"My goodness," Where the heck are those kids?" he sighed.

His thumb pressed the channel change button once more. The television program flicked onto a crime chase. It looked as though two people were running down the streets of some large city with a fleet of police officers trailing them.

"Well," Kakashi looked a bit intrigued, "If I didn't know any better, I'd say that the blonde guy running from the police was…oh no."

He crept closer to the television. The chase cut to a close up of the two running escapees. One was a blonde boy in an orange outfit and narrow lines across his cheeks. The other was a young girl with short black hair and completely white eyes. Her white heavy white coat was rustling with her movements.

"Naruto and Hinata?" Kakashi questioned.

He looked at the remote in his hand. The Surround Experience button had been plaguing him since he had first pressed it. It was time to test another theory. He pressed the button again.

* * *

"Naruto! Watch out. Those things are faster then any weapon we have!" Hinata cried out. Her worry was building with each bullet that zipped past Naruto.

Why he was the main target was beyond her. Wasn't she running away as well?

"Hinata, stay back. I can handle this. I…!" Naruto called back, but didn't finish his sentence.

The female ninja looked over to where her childhood crush was jumping. The problem was, he was no longer there.

"Naruto?"

* * *

Kakashi backed away from the TV screen. Something yellow and orange suddenly launched out of the glass and rammed into his stomach. He found his hyper active knucklehead student practically hugging him, only he was rocketed out of the television set and collided with him.

"Well, Naruto," Kakashi greeted cheerfully, "I've never seen you this happy to see me."

Naruto looked up to the masked face of his teacher, "Kakashi-sensei! We have to save Hinata!"

* * *

The Maiden of Light: These things are taking me forever to write, but that's because I'm working three stories, playing softball, doing library work, practicing for the talent show, and balancing school stuff. In the next chapter, we look in on our other friends. See you there. 


	4. American Idle?

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. But I will when pigs fly. But what am I saying? Pigs don't fly…….yet.

A Quick Look into our Jeopardy Game

Alex Trebek directed the attention of the audience to the board of answers once more, "Alright then. Strange Species for four-hundred. This animal is the only one in current existence where the male gives birth to the offspring."

Once again, Shikamaru's name panel lit up in accompaniment to the beep signaling that he knew the answer, "What is the sea horse?"

"That is correct." The host replied. The curving rows of the audience clapped politely at another right answer from the lazy-yet-brilliant ninja.

Ino and Kankuro stood hunched over and disgruntled behind their stations. Their scores combined didn't even make up a meager fraction of Shikamaru's score. He smiled smugly with the thought that he will be taking home quite a lot of money.

"Kankuro," Ino turned to her other competitor, "Don't date a genius."

* * *

In the American Idol Competition

_"Sakura! Sakura!" _

The crowd was chanting wildly. Gaara found himself in the middle of it all. The people jumping up and down around him and screaming at the top of their lungs had become an irritation really fast. He pushed his way through the excited crowd, shoving unimportant people (everybody in his way) aside. Once he made it towards the edge where no more people were clustering, he descretely lifted himself towards the light rafters with his sand. There was something about heights that made him feel a bit safer. Gaara hid himself on the metal bars toward the ceiling.

A mist of white fog flowed from the doors through which the pink-haired ninja emerged. The strange thing was that Gaara was still in the clothes that he arrived in, yet Sakura was differently dressed than her usual training clothes. He took one good look at her up and down and his jaw dropped. She glided out onto the illuminated stage. Her strapless sparkling red dress immediately caught his eye. Just the way it swished when she moved hypnotized him. Her feet were delicately strapped into matching red heels with thin laces that wrapped and crossed around her shins up to her knee. But she seemed to have been unable to remove her Kohona headband, because it remained in its usual place holding back her hair.

Gaara could have sworn he heard the demon within him make a little comment.

_"Dang! She is hot! I will make it a priority that you date that pink kunoichi!" _

Gaara hissed in response, "Shut up! No one asked for your opinion. Sabuka no Gaara does not love, or show any type of emotion for that matter!"

He heard the beast within him retort, _"Yeah, yeah. You tell yourself that." _

The music of a subtle piano began playing through the speakers. The sand ninja's attention was turned toward the stage below. The gentle spotlights focused on the girl as she brought the microphone closer to her lips.

"Where have all the good men gone?

Where are all the guards?

Where is the street wise Hercules to defend the rising odds?

Isn't there a white knight on his faithful steed?

Late at night, I toss and I turn and I dream of what I need."

Gaara was left amazed at the gentleness yet uncovering power her voice had. It reminded him of a storm. So far, her song was like sweet rain. The audience was almost completely silent and motionless. He was beginning to like this. Suddenly the music picked up the pace.

"Ohhhhhh!

I need a hero.

I'm holding out for a hero in the dark of the night.

He's gotta be strong and he's gotta be fast and he's gotta be fresh from the fight.

I need a hero.

I'm holding out for a hero until the morning light.

Well, he's gotta be smooth and he's gotta be soon and he's gotta be larger than life.

Larger than life…"

Just as Gaara was starting to loose himself within the smooth rolling thunder of Sakura's voice, a tiny click echoed in his ear. He looked around him. The sound was close to him. And there perched on the platform within the rafters that the light technition stood from was a man cloaked in black. He held in his grasp a black metal object shaped somewhat like an L. His gloved finger was hooked over a small curved piece of plastic in the bend and he was aiming the tip of its length downwards toward the stage. Memories kicked in as Gaara had seen one of these devices before. It was on television and it was used to kill people. It was a gun! This idiot was going to kill Sakura!

He silently lunged himself to the assassin and knocked the weapon straight from his hand. This should be cake.

"Somewhere after midnight in my wildest fantasy.

Somewhere out beyond my reach is my hero waiting for me.

(I wasn't positive on the next two lines so I'm winging it)

Rushing with the wind and rising with the heat

There will be my superman to sweep me off my feet."

High in the rafters of a television studio wasn't the best place to use destructive jutsus, after all, Sakura could get hurt. Gaara accosted the assassin silently and swiftly with the exception of the grunts coming from his target with every blow. He even laughed when the defeated mystery man fell through the bars and landed on the crowd of surprised audience members, which was something Gaara was not accustomed to. The music stopped and everyone looked up.

The smile faded from his face, "Uh oh."

Suddenly the sound of gunshots blasted from somewhere towards the back of the audience. The crowd ducked down and screamed with panic. Even singing Sakura on stage was a bit surprised. The studio turned into complete pandemonium. Gaara suddenly realized the danger for his pink-haired comrade and jumped down onto the stage, forming a shield of sand to protect them.

"I'm going to kill you!" Sakura screamed.

Gaara was caught suddenly off guard. What that comment directed to him?

She whipped out three kunai fanned like a hand of cards. She merely flicked her wrist with enough power in her swinging arm and they launched from her hand towards the back of the studio, and into the open window special effects room where all the lights were coming from. It was there that three men, all dressed in black clothes fell from the window, each of them grunting in pain and dieing at the wrath of an angry singer.

She continued, "You idiots ruined my song!"

After taking a few steps back, for his own protection of course, Gaara receded his sand into the heavy gourd upon his back. He was quite surprised that she could do that. Because these attackers had no chaka to sense, he would have never guessed where they were. Not to mention, she took all three out with a single fling of kunais, each one hitting their mark perfectly. His mental memo book kicked in.

_Don't make Sakura angry. Scary things will happen. _

"Hey Sakura," Gaara spoke gruffly.

She replied with a rather sweet smile, which was a complete transition from her moment of rage a second ago, "Yes, Gaara?"

Wording this wasn't going to be easy for the Kazekage, "When, or if I mean, I, well, I want to hear the rest of your song."

"Thanks," She smiled gently as she gave him a friendly hug, which he actually didn't mind that much.

Unknowingly to the two ninjas, the notorious American Idol judges were hiding under the table.

Simon spoke, "This is definitely the most exciting thing that has ever happened since we started this stupid show."

Paula followed, "I think we shoulder give it to her."

The three judges nodded in agreement.

* * *

The Maiden of Light: I'm so sorry everybody. I forgot I was writing this. (sweat drops as she laughs nervously) Don't count on this to be updated any sooner. I'm really busy. 


End file.
